Until I moved to Iran. Yes Iran, that country next to Iraq, where we are have been at war for the last 10 years. It's bigger than Iraq, and it's different. Why did I go off topic and start explaining where Iran is? Because people always ask, surprisingly enough A LOT of people have never even heard of Iran.
Anyway, like I said, I was fine, until I moved to Iran. Where everyone is opinionated. And always right. Sheesh, I couldn't even got on the freaking bus without someone telling me, "vay, khooskele, chera loghar nemishi? Heif." Which loosely translates into, "Oh, you pretty thing, why don't you lose some weight? It's such a shame." "Uh, well, that is none of your business!" is what I would have loved to snap back but instead I would smile, nod, and say thank you. It SUCKED so much.
My parents raised me proud. I was a proud Persian, even though I'm only half. You see, my mom is Mexican-American but let me tell you, and anyone with eyes will agree, she's more Persian than half the Iranian women I know. I knew I was smart, beautiful, funny, witty- not conceited, but confidant. But living in Iran changed me. People in my family were always saying, "your cousin Maryam lost weight, you should be able to, too." I would ask why THEy don't lose weight like she did, of course they would say it was past their time and you are stil young, you can do it.
I was 19 when I got married, which is why I moved there, I was waiting for my wonderful husband to serve in the army (mandatory for all Iranian males) and get his green card. It was great. I got to learn so much about my fathers culture, learn about the spices that run through my blood, and learn to
But my 19 year old confidence quickly turned to mush in this foreign land, and although I could hear my husbands voice in my ear saying they were wrong, I still hung on every word they said. It was like molten lava burning at me, day after day, week after week, for four years I suffered the insensitive masses telling me I was too fat.
Yes, maybe they just wanted me to be healthy. Yes, the old woman on the bus had a point, and her heart was in the right place. But my fragile ego could not take it. And I went from 220 pounds of not caring what other people said about me to 285 pounds of "I'm worthless." It seems stupid, sure. Why would I, a Leo and a Persian (both ridiculously proud) let anyone tell me things that I KNEW weren't important and I still cared? I don't know. But I do know that I ate my way through the next 4 years.
I managed to go up to 255 and was able to get back down to 225 for Eid, Iranian New years and also the first day of spring, in 2010. I did it with HCG, which is a great product if and only if you maintain it. Because if you don't you'll gain it all back in all the wrong places. Well, i didn't maintain for the 3 months after like you supposed to, and I went back to 255 in several months. Then in April of 2011 my doctor put me on some new hormone therapy that had just come out, a cure for endometriosis. "Of course I'll try it." I idiotically said, she said that I might have trouble loosing weight, what she did NOT say was that I would gain 20 pounds. Well, ok, 20 pounds, I'll lose it, it's ok. Then she put me on new birth control, which made me gain another 20 pounds, even though I was watching my calories/carbs/fat and exercising.
So lets back track, I was around 220 since freshman year in high school, then from the time I was 20-23 I was 250, but I'm 24 now and 285 pounds. That's much closer to 300 that 200 and I'm not gonna wait to see 300 on the scale before I make some changes.
The other thing that may have put me over, my mom was exactly 285 when she got Lapband surgery January 2010. I refuse to wait until after 40 to take control of my life. So here I am, in control, and starting my life again.
With the help of my wonderful husband who goes to the gym on a daily basis, and my mom, who gives me all her diet secrets, and my dad, who is my rock- I will succeed.
And all you Blogger's who've got me back.
